Halloween is still one of those holidays that people spend money on... to the tune of an estimated ten billion dollars this year alone. Yet, in a pinch situation, many of us can concoct a costume with items found in our kitchens, our medicine cabinets, and our dirty laundry hampers. Imagination rarely costs money, but the therapy required when creativity reaches twisted and damaging levels can rarely be paid for, so it's important if your children are going to be rendered sociopaths due to ignorance, it's important for the damage to be great...and permanent; disability insurance doesn't pay the bills for those with intermittent symptoms, and children who are merely weird and disassociated these days are a dime a dozen. Yes, they are.
With relatively little money, and just a bit of pizzazz you can represent yourself in a Halloween costume that is not only functional, but will surely have your children remembered as the 'pariah's to avoid' for generations to come.
In the coming weeks, not only will Halloween be discussed for it's true meaning, the candy, but we'll also be debunking popular mythology and in general be celebrating what is still hands down the last remaining holiday to be whored out by the machine, unless you count Anne Romney dressed as a whore, with Mitt in his Tin Man costume which never fails to entertain for it's commentary not only on his 'thoughtful' character, but to perpetuate and invigorate the gay right's movement, which we all know he highly approves of.
Enjoy the coming month for all it's creepy creepiness, from Dracula costumes to some guy dressed as a big Boehner? Feelings will be hurt, belief's will be questioned, and in the end, we'll all cast our vote for best costume, and try to for once not just award it to the Elvira with the real hair and big boobs, because really?? Doesn't she walk around like that more or less all the time, minus the cleavage??